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To my nephew Eli~
So, two weeks ago, on a Wednesday, you decided you could crawl. Your dad was still here as he was dropping you off on his way to work, so we both saw you get up on all fours and take off like a little mad baldish man. I didn’t cry or anything even though I was so proud of you!
Then this morning, you crawled over to the entertainment center and pulled a booklet to the Wii off to chew on it. I was busy and didn’t notice what you’d done for a few seconds. When I took it away from you, you opened your mouth and yelled at me, and with such a good close up view I was able to see all the tiny white bits of paper stuck to your gums. But when I tried to swipe them off, I got a huge surprise – they weren’t two little pieces of paper, they were two little sharp teeth!! I have to tell the truth here…I did tear up when I realized they were teeth. Only big boys have chompers, and now you’re a big boy! I had to go wake up your cousin and let her see them too. She stumbled out here with crazy bed head and cried a little too when she saw them.
But your day of adventures in growing up wasn’t over yet. At 12:30, mere hours after the tooth discovery, you blew me away again. You were hungry and wanted your bottle. We’d just taken a nap and you were still snuggled up to me on the couch when you woke up hungry and I woke up needing to pee. Cousin made you a bottle and I fed you for as long as I could, but after a few minutes it became an emergency situation so I laid you next to Cousin so I could run to the bathroom and she could feed you. But, when I started to hand her the bottle, you ripped it away and stuck it in your mouth all on your own! It was the first time you’ve held your bottle for more than a few seconds on your own. And you actually drank the whole thing and then flipped over, crawled a few feet and burped yourself.
You are growing so fast, Mr. 7 Month Old. I appreciate being a part of your life and getting to see you every day. Even though you are technically your mommy and daddy’s baby, you are untechnically mine too…and I couldn’t be happier about that. Thank you for being such a gorgeous little guy and such a joy to be around.
As soon as you give me a few minutes of peace I’ll find my camera and insert the obligatory close ups of your teeth and crawling skills here. Until then, I love you Son Son…and remember, hold the #2 until your mommy gets home!
~Aunt NeNe
Wanted to pop in and say, great things are in the works! I currently have the fastest pieced quilt EVER all over my kitchen table and living room floor. It’s a king sized stacked coin pattern in greens, blues and whites. I have no pics as it’s too late to take any good ones and it didn’t occur to me earlier, of course. But with the week off (yay, first time off since February, no wonder I haven’t been sewing!) I decided to redo my (our) bedroom. Of course we needed a new quilt, since I’ve never made anything for DH and I at all, all of my quilts have been baby or just because gifts. There’s enough scraps left over to do matching pillowcases and a wall hanging as well, since there’s a painting done right on our bedroom wall that the landlord doesn’t want painted over…I’m not a huge fan of Tinkerbell so it has to be covered. I’m really excited to see everything put together and to get some pictures. Tomorrow, I hope.
On a personal note, lately I’ve been able to see my good friends who live far away every weekend. It’s been so fun. I love company almost as much as I love sewing, which is saying a LOT.
On another note, my house is thrashed for the first time since we moved in and even though it’s driving me nuts, it also feels more like home than ever before. It’s not filthy by any means and the kitchen and bathrooms are spotless. Still, it’s pleasantly messy, which is a total switch for me. I am enjoying it. Without a cuddly baby rolling around and crawling all over everything, I find I don’t have to pick up quite as often, lol.
Anyway, it’s after midnight and I’m determined to make a little more progress on this quilt before I go to sleep, so I’m off for now. More details coming soon!
Okay, first of all, the baby screamed all stinkin day and DD was having an extreme attitude problem. Even though I woke up in a great mood, I took a nap and woke up from that in a horrifically painful and emotionally unstable mood, so bear that in mind…
Breakfast was, again, the Kix. This time I made myself drink the milk. It was okay.
Lunch was half a can of tuna with no mayo, and leftovers of last night’s hugely stuffed salad with a small bit of Ranch. It was good.
I had two snacks. They were both…sigh…chocolate pudding cups. There are only three left and then those things are never coming in my house again, I swear it!
Dinner was last night’s chicken and brown rice. I was too full to have anything else with it.
You ever have one of those days where everything seems bad? Every choice you’ve ever made, every accomplishment you’ve ever had seems like a wasted effort because the day is just so gloomy and gross that nothing good could come of it so what was the point in getting to this point in life…that was me after that nap, all day long. I overslept, big time, and it threw me off completely. Never, ever again!
On the plus side, I lifted weights for half an hour and feel pretty good about that. Slowly easing back into the workout thing…what I really want to do is just go for it, but I’ll be really sore and I can’t handle that on top of these crazy kiddos, lol.
So what about you? What did you do today?
Breakfast was a bowl of Kix with no milk. It was also rushed in between barfing babies, crazy mini dogs and a kid driving me crazy. It was pretty lame.
For lunch I had a handful – a handful of grapes, half a handful of almonds, two of broccoli, and…Cheezits. Not even a whole handful of those though, lol.
Then I had a chocolate pudding cup for a snack. Why? Because I opened the fridge and saw it and really wanted it. THEY HAVE GOT TO GO. lol.
Dinner was okay, I made brown rice for the first time ever (the real kind, not the instant kind) and we had a huge green salad with tons of veggies and baked chicken breast. I wasn’t really that hungry but I ate it anyway. It was better than I thought it would be.
The hives went away a little and then came back a lot, so I’m kinda grouchy again.
We did schoolwork and had friends over and I finished most of the dishes and laundry that I didn’t get to yesterday, so I guess it wasn’t a wasted day.
Also, I watched a whole lot of One Tree Hill, Season One, online at the WB. Why? Because I have a sick addiction to high school dramas. Why? I honestly can’t tell ya. I never went to a basketball game that didn’t end in a brawl or the ER, and I didn’t sleep with anyone at all that I met in school, and around here basketball is NOTHING compared to Football, so I really can’t identify with anything these people do. However, that does not prevent me from enjoying every single second of it and wishing my hair looked like Peyton’s and my husband looked like her boyfriend…lol. It’s a good time killer for right now when I’m still pretty down (not to mention itchy) so I’m not going to give it up…yet.
I also went to the thrift store just up the road and picked up some science-y books for the kid’s school work, and a book that teaches you how to scrapbook for me. Yes, I already know how to scrapbook, and I don’t need to have this book; but somehow, when I saw it, it said to me, I belong on your craft book shelf, so that’s where it goes.
I also worked on my “you are” layout in my art journal (I know you have no idea what I’m talking about. I’ll tell ya.) It’s a quote from my favorite bedtime (okay, anytime) movie, Winnie the Pooh and the search for christoper robin. It goes like this:
You are braver than you believe,
stronger than you seem,
smarter than you think.
See why I like it? Talk about postive affirmations! Anyway, it’s a layout in my journal and if it turns out well I’ll try to scan it or photograph it to show ya.
Okay, that’s as much of an update as I’m able to do right now. My head’s wet and this towel’s heavy so I’m outta here…see you later!
a good day for my anxieties.
About a week and a half ago I noticed I was getting hives on my stomach and legs. They itch, but it wasn’t really that big of a deal…until they never went away. Now they are driving me crazy for a number of reasons – they itch and sting, they aren’t leaving, I don’t know what caused them (which is normal for hives) and the biggest reason is that I won’t take medicine to get rid of them. There’s no reason to go to a doctor (they are doctors OF MEDICINE, that’s what they give us to make us feel better and fix everything that’s wrong) because I am having panic attacks just thinking of taking a pill.
This sounds so stupid, but it’s the truth. I haven’t swallowed so much as an aspirin in the last three years. I manage to take the meds I HAVE to take because the alternative is worse and I know they help…but taking something NEW, for a new condition, is wigging me out big time. I could just take some Benadryl and the hives would probably disappear without another itch, but I can’t do it.
The last time I tried to force myself to take a pill I was afraid of, I threw up for three days and had massive panic and anxiety attacks (yes, there’s a difference. I’ll blog about it soon.) I learned in that second that I just can’t do it. My fear of medicine is so much bigger than my fear of whatever the problem being treated is. I can’t explain it, it’s just kind of this wordless heat that I can’t overcome. And right now, I’d love some instant relief so I wish I could take an allergy pill and get over this…
Anyway, last night I was up until after four because I was so itchy I couldn’t sleep. Finally I broke down and put some corisone cream on the hives (creams are different than pills I guess, lol) and was able to sleep for a few good hours. This morning I woke up and researched hives and the thing that I keep coming back to is, if the hives last more than a week you’re supposed to go to the doctors. But I don’t want to go, because they’ll just tell me to take some antihistamines and come back if they don’t go away with treatment. I can’t take the medicine so why bother going to the doctors?
But then I think, what if I die from hives? I know this is probably physically impossible but once my anxiety is up there’s no stopping the crazy amount of scary thoughts I get. I am noticing a difference just from using the cream though so I’ll keep that up for a few days and see what happens.
This is the third medical problem I’ve ignored because of my terror of medicine.
My nightmare is getting in a car crash or getting pregnant or getting cancer or something and having no choice but to have medical treatment and drugs. I would be fine, I know that in my head, but the symptoms from my anxiety would be overwhelming at first.
Anyway, that’s not all I was here to blog about and whine about, I swear. It’s just an itchy rash from the heat probably, no biggie.
The biggest biggie right now is that I got out of my habit of eating breakfast and now I’m back to the starving until noon or dinner thing. I lost ten pounds within just about two weeks when I started eating breakfast. It keeps me fuller through the morning and then I don’t overeat at night. But now, with my nerves messing with my stomach, I’m not hungry in the morning (or any other time really) and I’ve already gained back three and a half pounds just from going back to my bad eating habits.
How do you make yourself eat when it’s the last thing you want to do?! I don’t get it…I know the eating disorders I’ve had in the past could still be screwing with my head but it seems like it’s not a mental thing, it’s a physical thing. You know? I have no desire to eat until I’m so weak and feeling like I’m going to pass out, and even then it’s a struggle to swallow more than a bite or two.
The other thing is, the hives get worse when I get hot. So I’ve been avoiding working out because I don’t want to get even more itchy.
So between not eating, itching, and not feeling energized and accomplished from working out, I’m a complete mess of a fat blob right now.
Okay, I totally lied. I only came here to whine and cry so now I’m leaving…I’ll come back happier, I promise!
In the past I’ve asked for tips on the best cleaning and workout music. Now that I’ve devoted Sunday nights to cleaning up and adding new songs to my iPod, I could use the same advice.
What are your favorite songs to listen to? It doesn’t have to be when you’re working out or cleaning, either. Just your favorite songs in general.
I’m one of those people who hates “new” music because it feels a little uncomfortable and wrong to like something more than my current favorites. A song can play on my radio a hundred times and I won’t like it until it’s been out at least a year. Why? I have no idea. It could just be my natural flakiness and inability to like change or decisions, who knows. I just know I don’t generally like new music, which makes it hard to find songs that I like. So I’m always asking my friends what their fave stuff is so I can check it out (Cat Stevens does rock, my friend, I just forgot to tell ya, lol.) So anyway, comment or email me your favorite songs!
Another thing I’m considering is documenting my weight loss, exercise and diet stuff here. Anyone interested?
In response to a great comment I just got (which I loved, btw, thanks for the happy feelings! lol) I’m talking about twiiter. I do have one. Under Messymama, of course.
The thing with Twitter is that it takes time and effort to put in all those teeny tiny updates. I’d actually love to do it. I’d love to have an online journal of 140 characters that explained my life in seconds and minutes. But to do that, I’d have to actually DO it…get what I’m saying?
Oh okay, I’ll just say it…I’m too lazy to Twitter. There, it’s out in the open now.
When I sit down at the computer it’s almost always to put up a blog. Or check my emails. Or research something that’s been driving my overwhelmed brain to distraction. I hardly ever sit down with the intent to condense something important into a tiny enough paragraph for Twitter. If I was more organized, dedicated, and less of a blabber mouth, Twitter would be ideal. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll ever be a great Twitterer (tweeter? whatever). But I do go there and read up on celebrities (Miley Cyrus, Demi Lavoto, etc, because I’m really a 13 year old girl at heart. Another deep dark confession.) I’m not giving up on it though, I’m just trying to get it in my head that I can actually do it and then go and DO it…anyway.
So this week has been one of the worst ones in my recent history as far as stress levels go. It’s the last week before we meet the teacher and of course, I’m behind, as always, so we’re cramming. With a 7 year old who rarely listens to me and even more rarely pays attention, cramming isn’t very fun. But it’s getting there. When you add that to all the stress of regular daily life around here (5 month old babies, husbands who act like five months old, five months worth of bills to catch up on…I think I hate the number 5…) things are kind of overwhelming right now.
What’s saving my sanity? Not much, since I didn’t have a whole lot to start with. But here’s some details of my latest passion, which I’ve been using to distract myself as much as possible…
This art journal is so inspiring. I love love love it!
This list kills me. Keri Smith is my new favorite person, honestly. She is so creative and inventive without making you feel stupid. Her Wreck this Journal is amazing! I don’t want it but I want to be as free and creative as she is.
So that’s what’s been keeping my brain from frying lately. Art journaling and scouring the internet for inspiration.
What’s been keeping you sane? what’s been making you insane? Share, let me know, talk to me people…later.
